I rarely ever cut loose these days. I’ve grown to be that responsible with my words and the choices I make in which ones to use and how to use them. It is mostly because of the results I have dealt with in the past that have led me to make different decisions.
When I meet a woman I try to avoid talking about sex. Here’s why.
As I have been working on my autobiography I have had to touch on my past relationships. Some of them were purely sexual and my last wife told me it was the sex she was going to miss the most.
When I start going into detail as to why, women start seeing me as a one time experience they have to have. They stop seeing the human being, much less the man and I become a walking talking sex doll.
The last one night stand I had was with a woman that started talking about how she could whore me out as if she was my pimp. That was nearly 3 years ago. I wish I was making this up.
When I was 24 a woman picked me up at a bar. She was 34 and told me later she had been watching me for a while before she approached me knowing she wanted to take me home. This woman had also confessed to me once that she liked to pick men up in bars for a one night stand on a regular basis. This woman told me the reason she hit me up for the second night was to find out if it was that good or she was that drunk. We broke up a year and half later and she has gone down in my personal history as one of the great if the not thee great love of my life.
She had 3 teenagers and I became a step dad of sorts at age 24. I stepped up and took it seriously. Kids aren’t a consequence they are a lesson in growing up and being responsible. It broke my heart to lose those kids as much as it did to lose her when it she left me.
This woman was one I was more intimate with than any other in my life. That is what led to the sex getting better and better over that year and a half until things went south in the relationship.
When I say intimate I mean this woman knew things about me I never told anyone and some things I only ever told her still to this day and we went separate ways over fifteen years ago.
This woman had been beaten by nearly every guy she ever dated or married. I never touched her. When we would fight the neighbors 5 miles away could hear us however at night when we went to bed I would reach over and run two fingers down her back as gently as I could to remind her a gentle man was in bed with her and she had nothing to fear.
She told me once that as soon as she felt those two fingers on her back I might get laid whether I wanted to or not.
It takes a true connection to seduce with a simple touch.
To put love not lust into the touch.
To put adoration not animal desire into a touch.
It takes respect to touch with love and adoration.
When you touch with love and adoration you create an experience that can’t be duplicated.
Respect starts with self respect.
Sex without self respect is trying to fill and endless void.
Self respect understands sacrificing gratification for the sake of the better quality experience.
The stronger a connection one and one build the greater the potential for the greater experience.
A patient mind reaps the greatest reward. That is a Karmic Law for a reason.
When you take a patient diligent approach to a relationship and strengthening the connection through conversation and daily living you’re rewarded with the best sex you can’t have any other way.
I was hanging out with a friend on the porch smoking joints and talking at looking at the stars. We do this almost nightly. We were talking about the film What Dreams May Come and what would heaven really look like to us. For me it’s a small place in the mountains or deep in the woods where I am doing the dame thing we do every night only with a woman who is my partner in life and we sit and talk every night under the stars.
I don’t watch TV. The only times in my life since I was 22 that I have watched TV on a regular basis was because the woman I was married to or living with at the time did.
There is a lot to think about when thinking about what happens between sexual experiences.
We always tend to think of the word consequence as being bad or something we would like to avoid.
For me having to watch TV is a consequence of having a monogamous relationship with a woman who likes to watch TV.
What do you put up with to have sex with the person you are with right now?
What have you put with in the past?
What results that you didn’t like have come up from sex?
I love sex. I studied Tantra so I could have outstanding sex, not to be celibate.
I have self respect and understand the gift I have turned myself into for a woman where sex is concerned. Not a gift to all women, a gift to one woman I can talk endlessly to.
I have lived the consequences for accepting anything less.
So have you.
I love that I was truly and deeply in love with the mother of my son when he was conceived. I am grateful we were in love when he was created. Though he was unexpected, I have never seen my son as a consequence. My son has been the greatest gift my decisions have ever produced.
That anyone would see a child as a consequence is disgusting to me.
It tells me how little respect they have for themselves to have had the sex that them left feeling as though the child was a consequence and not a gift.
Life is a gift.
Creating life is a responsibility.
You have responsible sex because of the gift that might be created by both of you. You have responsible sex because of the responsibility that comes with that gift of having a child.
It is a good thing to be picky and make sure this one is one you could see as a parent for the sake of the child that might end up being created. It is good to be creating in oneself a parent that can guide a life and work with a partner to make sure that life is made with love and raised knowing it was created with love.
If you don’t ever want to have kids, take the responsible steps to make sure you don’t.
A disease is a consequence.
A child is a gift.
Losing a part of your soul to some one who is going to give you the shittiest part of theirs in return is a consequence.
Losing your self respect just to get off is a consequence.
Making yourself a gift for one is finding one to create synergy with in all areas of life in a deep bond that has levels of energetic connection that never cease to be there regardless of the distance.
That takes time to build even though it might be felt in an instant how compatible one and one might be.
Suffering from insanity is doing the same shit over and over expecting different results.
Sweet insanity is doing the same things over and over because you like the results.
Patience leads to greater rewards while impatience often leads to consequences.
When it comes to sex, I met that woman at age 24 it was the next day as we sat and talked that after I had left her daughter told her she had never seen her that happy before with someone. That woman and I talked a lot to each other. We strategized life together as partners in every area of life. Sex was the bonus even though we did it backwards. The exception that does not happen very often in anyone’s life and only once in mine.
This has nothing to do with morals and everything to do with results. The emotional health of a human being starts with conception. The health of your soul is not based on morals, it’s based in actions and the intent behind those actions. Morals you can debate endlessly however you can’t argue with results.
Take a look at the results in your life where sex is concerned and figure out for yourself if you see consequences or rewards and why you see it that way.
If you have any questions…