September 3rd is my Birthday. Funny enough I share a birthday with Charlie Sheen.
I heard from people I never hear from today. If you only notice me once a year, why the fuck are you in my life in anyway?
I have said for years that it is impossible to have hundreds or thousands of connections that you can actually say are people you talk to. I barley ever speak to half the less than 80 people I have on Facebook but some of them do notice when they get dropped though we don’t speak often. The only reason I keep my Facebook active is so I can talk to a friend of mine in Uganda. A solid young man. I met him when in the course of a week I got over 300 friend requests from Uganda. He’s the only one left. We talk sometimes a few days a week or a couple weeks could go by.
I study culture through the people who live in it because of everything I found out the history books and anthropologists got wrong once I was able to talk to the real people. It’s a common trait for a Hungarian. We tend to immerse ourselves in a culture to study it from the inside out and not as an outsider. There are things an outsider will never be shown in any community or culture unless you live in it with them.
I have been studying social media as much as I have been participating in it. Twitter is spam. Facebook is chain emails. Linkedin is pretending not to be chain emails. beBee is what sycophants look like in the online world and remember I worked their system so well I was made a brand ambassador for beBee at one point in time. That was after I left the site and wrote a damning article and then came back a couple months later.
I saw behind their veil and the inner workings and never signed anything they could use in a court of law to not talk about everything I saw. Linkedin likes it when I stop reading their minds about why they are doing certain things and telling everyone about it. I am a Telepath and that’s what I live with every breath and sleep is the closest thing to an off switch.
It’s scary to think I exist much less having to deal with me.
Something a friend of mine I hang out with most nights on the porch with is learning to do. I stopped holding back. I really do work at limiting what I know at the conscious level however it’s not my fault other people are trying to keep secrets. The video at the end of this piece explains the more you try and keep it secret the more it shows up on my radar or the radar of anyone who can see.
I have no secrets I keep but those I keep for others as a Shaman. What is funny as hell to me is the power of disbelief. Your disbelief actually makes you easier to manipulate. It’s why Aleister Crowley called the magician evil. He knew the cards or Tarot system he was designing was the trick and any true seer does not need the cards. All you have to do is ask questions.
I have been honest about this for years on social media so this is no big secret I am letting out of the bag today. What is tragic is the number of people who I tell them what I do and then do it to them because they need me to prove myself.
What I do is no trick to be tested.
I do a lot of what I do as it is needed in the lives of the people around me. I live to shred the veil on any and everything I happen to see or am I asked about. I am a big fan of the truth. I am a truth seer.
For a lot of people that makes me very scary. I can see into the truth of any situation beyond the singular limited perception of one view. Because I am a Shaman this makes me useless to any government working in espionage or company for that matter. I only hold value if it is truth you seek. Most people don’t want to see the truth of their lives, the truth they think no one sees or knows about. We all live behind masks and all of us have a fear of what if they knew insert yours here. People never want to hear the truth when it comes to the cost of their daily life and the things around them.
People who bitch about smokers and drive cars are hypocrites. Poisonous fumes are OK because it is a mode of transportation yet second hand smoke is something we should be focusing more attention on. Fucktarded is what we are as a people and it is due to the blind eye we turn in order to be comfortable in ease of living.
As the guy who sees everything we ignore to have some manner of bliss in life, I am not a fan I do it either. However I still have to live with it.
Rather than give you some false image I am trying to sell like most people online do, I give you the real me, stripped down and blunt to the point no bullshit no games. It’s why I deleted my Twitter account and for the record I am a Taltos Shaman.
I have developed something I use personally I call Khaos Shamanism and it very much is simply the way I live my life daily. While much of it would not look like ritual or ceremony, it is. There is no book I could write to teach you from. The only way to learn my way is observe me and be around me and talk to me one on one. It’s why I never do classes and take on students as they appear in my daily life and all the shit under the services page is there so it looks like I am trying.
The Devil’s Children book under the books page above is my life fictionalized. No I am not the new devil. Let me repeat that, I am not the new devil.
I have shared the Amazon page many times. I have seen many likes and some shares. I have only seen 5 purchases. If you want to support a writer and show you give a shit, buy the book and tell other people about it and why they would want to read it. I have done this for my favorite author, Pete Conrad several times.
The only way anyone can get me to read anything these days is if Pete wants to me to edit a script for a final once over before having money people read it. I’m good as an editor for story tellers. I did a couple for a guy named Dom Portalla a few years back. One film is The Darkness Within. If you’re real fucking lucky you will never see Catharsis from Last Rock Star Productions after they decided to not listen to me. The film sucks balls and not even in a good BMovie kind of way. I am ashamed my name is on it.
I have had to stare something in the face lately. I’m working with a coauthor to write my autobiography and I really am a blogger. I have often said it was a miracle I was able to write The Devil’s Children. I’m an abstract thinker and it’s why blogging fits me so well. I accidentally got trained for it by the old PM Reports I used to write as a Manager for ITI. I had to sum up my day in one report using the fewest words possible.
On social media we act as if this is some sort of fantasy story we are taking part in and that those pictures are not really people. At least that’s what it looks like when you really step back out of it and watch it.
“I don’t do that.”
We all do. Get over it and forgive yourself and do better.
An apology with no change in behavior is a lie so you can continue the abuse.
I am not one for softening the sting of the truth. Understanding cannot be achieved without truth. Truth often ends long suffering brought on by deceit. Being ignored causes suffering. Social media exists on the principal that if you are not on their network you do not exist and may as well be ignored.
Yes it does.
Anyone remember the Ego Ninja piece I wrote. Here’s how it works. I channel for my side of the debate. I have told this before and people still want to credit me with all of it.
Why am I the asshole for telling you up front what I do and how I do it and you fall for it anyway because you decide to test it or play games with me which I really fucking hate. I am a master level Empath which means I am a master level chameleon and my mirror never fails and I can still go into any environment and mirror it. It’s how I became a brand ambassador on beBee.
Why do I keep bringing this shit up?
Because you all keep either forgetting it or are truly stupid and I know there are some that are the latter. I am not the only one by a long fucking shot. I do this because this is what we as a species are evolving into. I do this for the kids being born who are as advanced if not more advanced than I am.
At some point we are going to have to deal with it for the sake of the children, why the fuck not, start now.
The emails I love and hate at the same time are the ones I get where people tell me they believe in me and my message or that I inspired them or what not. With the monumental amount of shit I take as Shaman and someone who is honest about his natural born abilities, I have often told people I wouldn’t wish my life on my worst enemy.
I make it look it fun and easy. My life is work in every breath I take and the only rest or relaxation I get is sleep and the only way I sleep more than an hour is with weed or really great sex. I’m a serial monogamist. Right now without weed I don’t sleep. For about 3 years that’s what it has been. However to do what I do and I have had to fake entire relationships as a Shaman on the job doing a soul retrieval or some favor for the Arch Angels. They trained me to do what I do.
God works in mysterious ways and God’s ways are not for the human to always understand or where would the mystery that makes life worth living go. Part of being a Shaman is understanding God’s way on occasion when it suits God’s need. I am not even close to being the only one. When the Shamans of this world wouldn’t come forward the Universe brought us in so to speak.
When you need someone like me it should not have to be some kind of epic fucking journey to find us. We should be where we can be found easily in order to make the biggest impact in the world community by community.
We are not doing anyone any favors if we charge admission.
We are not doing anyone any favors if we are making it an event or expecting people to listen to us in mass.
That defeats the purpose of what a Shaman truly teaches if one is to set another free from their burden. One and one is 3, the you the me and the we. The fewer the voices the easier the lessons are learned. The more one has to pass on to other ones when the two become 3.
This again is not new. If you have followed me over the least few years, I have brought this up on occasion in various forums.
I’m one of the few totally honest people online unless I am on the job and then I let you tell me how to lie to you and make it seem true. That’s the part of a Shaman’s life that unless you are on the job, it would take telling the life tales of all parties involved for you to understand why I did what I did because that is what it took for me to get it.
Yes this piece is an avoidance technique for not writing my autobiography which to me feels like a homework assignment and the book I never wanted to write. Besides if you follow my blogging you get it all anyway. However as the servant to the Gods that never were and have always been and the names I call upon as needed, I will be finishing it when it’s finished and yes I will procrastinate as much as possible about writing it and it’s why I have a coauthor to kick in me in the ass as needed. I know my faults and plan accordingly.
For a Shaman, God does a lot of the planning, life of service is a life of service that is not your own to profit off of. It’s why I write fiction to make money.
You actually have to need me to find me.
If you really need me, chances are you couldn’t afford the $1000 an hour I could charge and because I am often that busy with people in need, I don’t have the time or the energy to give to those who would merely want it. A Shaman like me shows up among those who can afford it and simply want it and spends all their time talking about the people who need it.
A Shaman does not fart on the snare drum.
I tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear and rarely do the two ever meet.
Yes I am available if you can find me and truly need me. If you just want me, well look at the services page and think entertainment.
In the mean time I will be posting when I feel I need it. Takes a lot out of me to get linear writing this book. this stuff just flows like it ain’t no thing.
I hope you understand why I am not playing the social media game any longer.
Until I feel the need to blog again have fun and remember we are all blessed and what a world it would be if we all just acted like it for one day.
For me blogging is breathing as music is to a musician. I don’t know who I am without having a blog in my life that suits the life I am living at the time. That’s why I have deleted the last 3 that had over a thousand pieces collectively. This one however feels like the home I was refining for my writing all along.
Long live Rock N Roll.