How music saved my life

A few years ago I came one good hard push on a dagger away from ending my life. In fact I stood in my living room with a 14″ dagger on 3 separate occasions ready to kill myself. Here’s what stopped me.

When I awoke to the fact I am an Empath, Telepath and a Medium, I started talking about it and telling people.

I lost every close friend I had save one who was on the other side of the country. My 3rd wife who is also an Empath became abusive because she lied about her being and thought I should too. My parents decided I was under the influence of Satan. My 2nd wife used it to try and take my son out of my care. She lost that court battle.

That was the first of 3 shrinks I saw who have all given me a clean bill of mental health.

The ridicule of being told I was crazy or full of shit or that my X-Men powers are something people should run away from led to me wanting to kill myself.

What stopped me each time was 3 songs that became anthems in my life.

Freak Like Me by Halestorm.

Thank you Lizzy Hale for writing that one even though you had no idea who would grab on to it as a song of hope. Many of us have been made to feel as though we should be freaks locked up in the basement hidden from the world.

We Are The Others by Delain.

Thank you Charlotte Wessels for writing another song you had no idea would become a song of hope for a bunch of people who felt and often still feel like others and are made to feel as they don’t belong.

Born This Way by Lady Gaga.

Thank you Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta because I and so many others were simply born this way and deserve the same respect and acceptance as any human being. Again we were not the ones the song was being sung about however it became a song of hope and inspiration for us.

The kind of ridicule and abuse people such as myself have taken and at times still take led to me wanting to end my life and has done the same for countless others.

For me after the 3rd time, I made a promise to myself to never think about suicide ever again. As a symbolic gesture of this, I took the dagger I was going thrust into my heart and wrapped it up in a towel and threw it in a dumpster.

I haven’t felt suicidal since no matter how much ridicule and abuse I have taken in the last 3 years since.

#Halestorm

#Delain

#LadyGaga

 

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2 thoughts on “How music saved my life

  1. Wow, such an honest and inspiring post! I’ve never quite been suicidal, though there have been times where I felt so low that had a doctor told me I had a terminal illness, with only six months to live, I would have been relieved. Music brings so much pleasure to my life, making it definitely worth living. I’m glad those songs were able to give you hope and a new perspective.

    Liked by 1 person

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