This day feels anything but typical
Woke up choking on a miracle
I don’t know why
My teacher told me what I’m made for
I beg to differ in the outcome
I don’t know why
There’s nowhere to run
When you’re hiding from the truth
It’s some kind of joke
When the tears are bleeding blue
Looking glass fire
When the pain is caused by you
It’s some kind of joke
When the student is ready the teacher arrives.
What if you learn by teaching?
What if you teach by learning?
When one is called to teaching one understands that one is ever the student and the teacher in every waking moment of life. One studies everything that would make one a better teacher. What makes one the best teacher is when a student never has any questions. It means the lesson was taught in a way the student would understand.
People tend to hate it when I bring up that most of my students are would be teachers and those have also answered the call to guide and teach and heal. The ones who hate it most are the ones called to be teachers and guides and healers. Here’s why.
The lessons I have to teach can’t be found in any book and what are they should have learned already.
Anyone who thinks being this guy is fun, I make it fun. Anyone who would say they want to do what I do has no clue what in the blue holy fuck they are talking about and has no idea the life I had and the sacrifices I make to be me to do what I do.
This morning I got a reminder that I do indeed know what my purpose in life is when my lesson cards reminded me. I have begged every god that never was and all that came before for a different life. However what God did as a joke was keep showing me why I was called to what I do. I kept having the experiences to tell me why me and why now and why like this.
I have run from doing what I do since I was in my early twenties and probably even longer if I am honest with myself and how many of us are that different in the life we feel drawn to as a moth to flame. It had to someone, why not me?
Being honest means you are going to bring the pain of the truth and when you ask yourself why me, why now and why like this and the answer you get back is “Do you see anyone else stepping up to the plate. They all see it and no one is saying anything, why not me?”
Tears that bleed blue are honest tears that once gone give you the chance to see why you never need to cry again. There the tears that if you let go of of the view that brings them that can set you free. That’s when the rebuilding starts after you let the truth break you.
I’m almost done with all my secrets
I’ll take my time to fake a deep breath
The funny thing is the number of people who have thanked me for the verbal bitch slap from way back of truth they got that one time from me, not often, but there have been more than a few over the years and out of that tragedy we often find ourselves joking about it and see the humor looking back once we disconnected from the pain that caused the moment to unfold as it did. I fake a deep breath because I am always chilled out unless I need to be otherwise to make a point and better allow myself to be a mirror of what is going on around me and project back so they can feel what they are throwing around.
As a teacher I spend most of time in mirror mode. Mirroring all around me and mirroring who I am engaged with one on one as it allows me to speak their “language” to ensure I am understood. As a teacher it’s about them getting what they need from me and not about me getting what I want or need from the engagement. My social life finds me with a lot of temporary friends who happen to be students who needed the lessons I teach.
These are aspects of my life I keep secret because it ruins the illusion. I always understand why I’m in some ones life regardless of the labels we use to describe the relationship. I teach most effectively by simply being me and by explaining why I am or am not going to go along with any one given thing.
In a room full of red pretend to be dumb
We fall on our face pretend to be numb
Wen someone comes at us guns blazing full of rage it’s easy to pretend to be dumb and get the fuck out of the way and not let it ruin your day.
The funny thing is they desperately need someone to step in front of that freight train and slow them down before they fuck themselves up.
How many times do we look back and feel stupid for feeling the way did when we see where we are now. That’s when we see the cosmic joke that life is and finally laugh at the joke we made of ourselves.